flowering sol

LOVING LIMITATION?!

admin — Sun, 13 May 2012 16:59:47 +0000

I know, in spiritual circles it might sound like “limitation” is a bad word. But I am increasingly convinced that embracing it IS the key to lasting success when it comes to making our dreams real in our physical lives.By this I mean if you want money, if you want business or creative success, if you want a real relationship and if you want to feel great in your body– you need to have a respectful relationship with limitiation. Even– and I know this may sound crazy– enjoy it!

I know if you are reading this, you are naturally spiritual or at least know you are more than your body, and you understand on some level that the Universe is unlimited. That’s true, and our work in these bodies is to bring that unlimited potential into a physical, limited form.

So if you want to just feel joy and bliss, go ahead and meditate and focus on limitlessness. If you don’t want any tangible results in your life, that works. I did it for awhile and while I loved my meditations, my life got harder, not easier!

I’m not saying to never do this, just beware if you always do it.

So what are some signs you are not respecting limits enough?

You tend to have fantasy relationships, or you or your partner feel disconnected from one another
You visualize and affirm your dreams and still they haven’t come true
You don’t feel connected to your body
You are chronically late or in debt
You push yourself to the point of exhaustion
You frequently feel embarrassed

How can you start to respect limitations?

Try a grounding meditation. This is the first thing I teach in the first class of the Intuitive Training Program, because in my opinion it lays a foundation for healthy and effective intuitive awakening. Here is a 4-minute sample.
Allow yourself big goals and dreams, but then think backwards from your goal to where you are now. How big is the gap? Where will you need to be right before you get your goal? What will you need before that? Keep back-stepping until you get to where you are now. Now, you know where to begin! This can be applied even to simple things, like if you know you have an appointment at 3 pm and you have 6 things to do between now and then, consider how much time you need for the 6 things and be sure you start in time to do them and get to your appointment on time!
Listen to your body: rest when you need rest, eat when hungry, drink water when thirsty, exercise when your body groans and starts to squeak (or ideally before
Check in with your loved ones. You all may be psychic, but don’t assume they know how you feel or what you need. Use words, touch and actions, and everyone will feel more connected and secure.

How can you tell whether you’re in a healthy place of honoring limitation or if you’re just in fear and contraction?

When we honor limitation, there is a feeling of enthusiasm and empowerment. You feel centered, in command and “on track” towards your goal.
When we are in fear and focusing on limits in an unhealthy way, there is a feeling of contraction and disconnection from Source. We focus on why things cannot happen instead of how they can.

In the physical world, limitations exist. To not honor that is to be to some degree in fantasy or denial. It can also be disrespectful to other people, but ultimately you are the one who pays for it.

But here is the interesting part, and here is where the joy comes in…

As soon as we embrace limitation, we suddenly become unlimited in our 3-D lives. But the tricky part is we have to fully say OK to limitation first.

It’s like letting go of a relationship to allow it to come back stronger. If we let go with an ulterior motive, we are still hanging on and it won’t work.

So we have to fully say, “Ok, I’ll pay bills, I’ll be on time, I’ll communicate and keep my word, I’ll take care of my body, I’ll be practical about my goals” etc. etc. and to some extent surrender our fantasies.

And then BOOM– suddenly we get so lined up with our desires that they start to come our way and we feel absolutely unlimited.

As long as we resist getting grounded and being practical, we can never be unified because we are always fighting something in our minds. And as long as we are fighting and dividing ourselves– part of us feeling the bliss of limitlessness and part of us hating the fact that we have bodies or bills or human emotions to deal with– we have too much “friction” in the way of our success.

Here is another secret: Limits aren’t really as limited as we might think. Everything in the physical world vibrates and is ultimately made of space. Our bodies, for example, are mostly water and so actually very changeable.

When we consider “getting in our bodies,” many of us feel like we have to stuff our big, wild selves into a container and we understandably rebel! But instead we can imagine we are just coming in for a landing, that our spiritual being starts to vibrate in the cells of our body which begin to radiate with our joy.

Then we can imagine that our physical body and actions start to resonate naturally with who we really are. I feel this a lot in my yoga practice or when I’m in nature, but you can also just imagine it. Try it and see!

Meanwhile if you’d like to read more on this topic and how to cultivate your energy in your body and empower your life, check out this article I published a couple years ago, “Do You Leak Energy?”

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Want to use this article in your E-Zine or Web Site? You can, as long as you use this complete tag with it: Intuitive Healer Ann O’Brien publishes the “Flowering Sol” email newsletter to help you blossom into your light. If you’re ready to open up your intuition and creative power to fulfill your dream life, get your free gifts at www.FloweringSol.com.

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ARE YOU WILLING TO CHANGE?

admin — Thu, 29 Mar 2012 23:52:03 +0000

Do you ever feel like things aren’t changing as fast as you want them to? Like you’re doing all the “right” things and working your butt off to change them, and they just won’t?

I have certainly been there. And sometimes it’s just timing.

But not always. In order to change our circumstances, my teacher taught me we need to be able to have 2 things:

Where we are right now
Where we are wanting to go

This means we need to fully accept the truth in the moment, as well as the potential situation we are looking to create.

What most of us do instead most of the time falls into one of 2 categories:

Whining
Fantasizing

Oh dear! But yes it’s true.

When we are either whining or fantasizing, we are basically saying, “Where I am right now is not ok.” And when we aren’t ok with where we are, we’re not present.

When we’re not present, we can’t get anywhere! Have you ever tried it?

I can’t count how many times I’ve driven around while talking on the phone or to the person next to me, and missed my exit. Now, on the freeway it’s easy to turn around, but what about your big dreams in life?

How long do you want to wait for them to happen? How many detours do you want to take along the way?

I remember once having a client who spent an hour convincing me she was alone, and that no one cared about her. I spent an hour sitting across from her thinking, “Hmmm, I’m a person who cares, who is here with her now, and she even paid me– but she’s not getting it.” She just kept telling her story and left feeling about the same as she started.

By contrast, I have clients that share with me major breakthroughs just months after one session. How do they do it?

They show up willing to change. They go into our work fully open to where they are at now, and fully open to their potential.

Now we all need to be heard, but often our stories are not the real “us.” They’re just our egos fighting for dear life, trying to convince us that they’re the most important thing on earth.

And they’re not. I do celebrate though when the stories start to fight, because they wouldn’t be fighting if you weren’t on the verge of a breakthrough.

When I notice this, I know to look deeper, so if I don’t directly answer your question, that’s why. I’m not in service to your ego, but instead to you.

How do you discover the real you? Feel into your body. Ask yourself a question and feel your body’s response.

Even if it doesn’t make sense, the good news is no one can argue with it. And when you explore it, it will take you deeper, into breakthrough.

You can also use easy-to-learn energy tools, like we’ll be doing in the Intuitive Training Program. They are particularly helpful in clearing energy, and in distinguishing your truth from the “noise” around you.

Meanwhile, try this:

Consider a situation you want to change and ask yourself, with regards to that situation:

How much can I accept where I am right now?
How much can I fully accept being where I want to go?

If neither one is less than 100%, decide to shift it today, even a little. Ask yourself what is needed and take the first step.

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WHY I DON’T DO PAST LIFE REGRESSION

admin — Thu, 08 Mar 2012 22:06:19 +0000

Ever wondered about your past lives? Had a sense when you went to a new place that it wasn’t the first time? Felt intense attraction or resistance or just a familiarity with a particular person that just didn’t make sense?

Yesterday, my Intuitive Training Program students learned to look at past lives and karma. We covered how to tell if you have karma with someone, how to clear it, and how to see what the past life was (where applicable).

And that “where applicable” is important. In my work and life, I find I’m happiest and most effective when I keep coming back to the question “What is life enhancing?” or “What serves this situation the most?”

And when I ask those types of questions, and then follow the answer, I notice more life force starts to flow. Whether it’s in my own life or in my client as I help him or her, the focus on serving in the moment takes us quickly out of our “stuff” and into the lives we desire. And that’s usually deep down what we want anyway.

Just as we can easily get in our heads about our relationships, health or work, we can mentally obsess over psychic stuff. There are some mass beliefs that say our focus is “good” just because it’s “spiritual,” but I have seen people spiral down into psychic chaos when they’re not balanced in their approach.

With regards to past lives, they can be a lot of fun to look at. They can help us understand situations and discover who we are as souls, and they can help us release patterns and move forward. For these reasons, I do read them from time to time.

The effects of past life or even present time actions are sometimes known as karma, or the Universal law of cause and effect. Since our spiritual nature is pure emptiness and bliss, anything we do in our 3-D bodies creates a ripple in that stillness. The ripple makes waves in the world around us, and then we instinctively want to get back to emptiness and bliss.

That desire, to counter the ripple, is what we know of as karma. Sometimes we repeat the same ripple as if it’s a broken record stuck in the same groove. Our souls hope if we annoy ourselves long enough with the same pattern we’ll break it. Other times we create the opposite extreme in order to counter the past pain– only to create a ripple in a new direction.

Examples could be: You had several lives struggling as a slave on a farm, so you crave wealth but secretly doubt your worth and keep struggling and being broke. Or, you were in love with someone but lifetime after lifetime could not be together. So you meet them again and BOOM– you have to have them even if they’re married, abusive, across the world or whatever.

When I read past lives, I first use a special technique to see if my client has any karma with a specific person or group, or with regards to a certain situation in their life. Then, assuming I get a green light to do so, I help clear the karma.

Sometimes I get a glimpse of what the past lives were, but not always. I often see something general and am guided that a glimpse and brief communication is all that’s needed for my client to take their next steps.

I have often described a past life where the client groaned and said, “Are you sure you’re not talking about this life?” When this happens I laugh and say, “That’s what it’s all about– supporting you now.”

Sometimes we are willing to recognize a dynamic in our past lives that we may not be willing or able to see in our present circumstances. And in this sense they are useful to look at.

But I will not “regress” you. I will not take you back, because I’d like to serve you here and now and help you go forward into the life you desire.

Besides, times are changing. We have ended an era where life was based on cause and effect, need and co-dependence. We have entered an era based in wholeness and mutual gifting.

Where relationships used to be based in completing one another, now they are about each person’s wholeness and from there mutually gifting each other based on our individual strengths. Where being spiritual used to mean giving one’s power to a priest, guru or other leader who claimed to hold our ticket to God, we are now each discovering our own connection to God or Source.

Teachers can inspire us, lovers can compliment us, but no one is senior to our own soul.

And I stretch this to apply to our relationship with all of life, not just with individuals. Where we can remember our power relative to our past, or relative to psychic information we receive– we need not go back or down the spiral of endless process, repeating, or figuring things out.

Yes, feel things fully. Explore what has blocked you. But life in 2012 is asking us to do it more quickly, with our wings spread and our hearts open to the new.

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ARE YOU PSYCHIC?

admin — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 06:33:03 +0000

Have you ever wondered if you’re psychic? In case you thought “psychic” means predicting the future complete with names, dates and a crystal ball, guess again.Here are 5 common signs of psychic ability. They may not all apply to you, but if any of these ring true you definitely have some natural abilities!

1). You feel what other people feel. Ever feel sad or mad or anxious and don’t know why, then realize someone close to you feels that way? Or you feel fine then you go into rush hour traffic and you get stressed?

2). You think of someone then they call, or you call someone and they say “I was just thinking of you,” or “You called at the perfect time.” I have a running joke with my friends when they say this (it happens a lot!). I say, “I must be psychic.”

3). Relationships confuse you. You have trouble figuring out what’s “your stuff” and what’s the other person’s. Or someone says or does one thing, but you get an entirely different message. You’re not crazy, you’re psychic!!

4). You need regular alone time. If you start to lose track of your own thoughts, feelings and needs when you’re with others, you don’t need to join a monastary. ; ) You probably just need to learn how to manage your sensitivity.

5). You get creative ideas and revelations “out of nowhere”. I used to wake up with poems and songs in my head. Now, projects and insights come to me in the shower or when I’m washing dishes. They are like “downloads” or “a-ha”s– they feel bigger than the thoughts of my everyday mind.

Psychic abilities can be both a gift and a challenge, if we don’t know how to manage them. The first step is knowing what’s happening, and finding your center in the middle of it.

You don’t have to be confused or alone, but you may need support and practices to help you ground and make the most of your gifts. As things intensify on the planet, we sensitive folks will need to stay grounded more than ever!

If you’re intrigued, I invite you to check out the upcoming Intuitive Training Program. This program is customized to those attending and I’d be happy to have a conversation to see if this is a good fit for you. Request information.

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HOLIDAY RELATIONSHIP TIPS

admin — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 00:08:39 +0000

Holidays highlight our relationships for better or worse. They can be joyous times or they can reveal our loneliness or family drama.

There is so much cultural programming about what the holidays “should” be, and we usually have our personal and family stories as well. What have your stories been?

Holidays are generally the domain of the feminine. The feminine thrives in relationship and wants to feel loved and connected.

A friend and I realized the other day that we had similar family stories. Then, I realized it wasn’t just us– it pertains to our entire generation.

Even though my friend and his siblings have all been out of the “nest” for over 20 years, their mother is still leaning on them. She was frustrated that, with Thanksgiving less than 2 weeks away, they hadn’t made plans with her yet. My friend understood her desire for family yet he felt pressured, smothered and manipulated.

It got me thinking that while in recent history the masculine has gotten a bad rap for being domineering, the feminine has been just as controlling in her own ways. As the distorted masculine power has expressed through aggression or imbalanced will, the un-healed feminine has used manipulation to get her needs met.

Even as recently as my Mother’s generation, these programs were hard-wired into both men and women. Not that they were bad people; it’s just been the survival game on the planet. And when it comes to survival, we can be very stubborn even in changing patterns that have long out-lived their usefulness.

In my childhood, my Mother had to have Christmas at our house, according to very specific rituals that started a month ahead. She cried if she didn’t get the gifts she wanted, or if the rest of us didn’t like our gifts.

Once my Dad decided we were all going skiing in Utah for Christmas.” Everyone else loved it but my mother obviously sulked.

After so many years of this, I grew older and moved away then didn’t want to go “home” for Christmas anymore. Not that I didn’t love my Mother; quite the contrary. I just wanted more breathing room for my own experience, my own joy.

The Mother energy is the energy of giving life as well as sustenance. When we share connection and nourishment– which we do over the holidays– we all tap into this energy.

So let’s be aware this holiday season of the original impuse for love and connection. We all have this and we all have a Mother.

Probably, we wanted this with our mothers and to the degree we did not experience it, we resisted and then became whatever we got instead. Are you laughing yet?

The control games that have run rampant on the planet are changing. This changing game is impacting our finances, our intimate relationships and more.

We can listen to the news or talk politics all day, but where this is really going to change is when we can look inside and at our close relationships and shift the game there.

Control kills the possiblity for life and creativity. As we become aware of where we have sought love and experienced control, we can see where we got hooked and breathe into our original desire for love.

In fact, our true nature is love. Control and security may look alike at first glance. Look again.

This holiday season, let’s realize our true natures and find security in our authenticity with each other. There, we can truly trust. There, we can truly, deeply connect.

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HOW’S YOUR PSYCHIC SELF-CARE?

admin — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 15:11:23 +0000

I always know when I need a little energy tune-up. My body and relationships start to feel heavy and stuck and I don’t feel my joy as much.

I am grateful though, for all the joy I have felt in my life, because if I didn’t know what it felt like, I would never know when I was off-track. I remember years back when I didn’t know the difference.

Then, I thought feeling heavy and stuck was my “normal” state of being. So much so, that I didn’t even think my energy was heavy and stuck. I only see it now in pictures and when I remember it. Little did I know!

I am also grateful that I never get off track for too long, because I also know what to do to shift it. And, I have enough practice and support to make it easy to do those things, and not just think about them.

It’s hard to learn and sustain new habits when no one is there to hold us accountable, to cheer us on, and to practice with. We are human and we want connection. Without it, we give up more easily.

More and more, we are meant to learn and grow together. I would never have trusted my intuition if I didn’t have a supportive space to practice, and people telling me over and over, “You’re right on,” when I gave a reading.

Now, I don’t need that, but I did at first.

In my early 20′s I devoted 2 hours a day to spiritual practice, and I became vegan and severely restricted my diet. After 6 months of that, I got sick and gave it all up for awhile. After months of tofu, brown rice and chanting, I took antibiotics and ate a bagel and cream cheese and it seemed like the best thing on earth.

Why was I so strict in the first place?

Well, on some level I knew I had gifts and I wanted to develop them. On the other hand, I did it because I was pissed off.

I was fed up with feeling everyone else’s stuff and not hearing my own inner voice. I wanted to feel my freedom and I wanted to feel like my life was mine.

Somehow, I knew that the more I could do that, the better I could love and be loved. Deep down, my desire for love made me take on other people’s stuff. But becuase I didn’t like the result, I pushed away my true desire with all the “stuff”.

All that would make anyone sick!

I don’t want you to have to go through these things.

When we pick up feelings or thoughts from other people, we can never process them but only store them. It makes us crazy when we try, especially when we don’t know we’re doing it (which is most of the time).

All that time I felt heavy and stuck was because I was trying to solve problems and heal feelings that weren’t mine. The more I tried, the more stuck I got, and the worse I felt about myself.

My desire for love got me in and my desire for love got me out of that mess. Oh, love is a powerful thing!

Once I sought out support and training, it all turned around. Once I practiced simple daily exercises (like games of imagination, basically) to clear and circulate my energy it was like I could see straight again.

I’d love to support you…

If you feel like you feel things for other people, if you’re struggling to hear and trust your inner voice, or if you feel alone with your spirituality and need a spark for your inner light, please reach out and let’s talk about the “Psychic Self Care” Program.

I am accepting a small group and setting up the structure for this program now, and we’ll begin soon. Contact me to request a spot (no obligation) and let’s see if this is a good fit for everyone!

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DO YOU BLOCK LOVE?

admin — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 04:45:35 +0000

One thing some people don’t know about me is that I used to do martial arts. Then, they think it was for self-defense. Yes and no.

The martial art I did was Aikido, which is considered a “soft” martial art from Japan. Rather than blocking punches and kicking back when attacked, we learned to “catch” and then blend with our partner’s energy, and then move the energy in such a way that kept everyone safe.

Our teachers explained that the punch could represent intimacy just as easily as it could agression. It represented life force energy coming our way, and our innate responses taught us a lot about ourselves.

I cannot count how many times I heard our Sensei say, “Catch it.” And instead, how often we students would dart as the puch came, or push and shove to change the situation. How rarely we could actually be with the intense energy our partners brought us. It was an amazing practice and training for life!

I realize now how human that is. Not only when someone yells at us, but also (maybe even more) when someone is really loving us, it can be scary to stay present and connected.

It can even be scary to stay connected to our own bliss, our own joy. When life starts getting really good, how often do we put the brakes on, consciously or not believing the good can’t last.

Have you ever judged someone (or even yourself) as being unvailable? Unsuited for relationship? Like maybe something is wrong with them (or you)?

When we don’t seem to have the love we want, often that’s the first place we go. And then the real reason we don’t have the love we desire is because we aren’t centered in ourselves.

When we judge ourselves, we abandon ourselves and then no one else can find us let alone love us as we really are. When we judge others, we give our power away. In either case, when we judge we become un-grounded and vulnerable.

And then guess what? It’s actually not safe to open when we’re in that kind of state.

So the common “fight or flight” pattern in relationships actually comes from a very healthy, wise place of self-protection. Somewhere, deep down, we know we’d be better off getting centered first before we open.

And so those of you who feel like you keep “messing up” and you better find out what’s wrong with you and fix it, guess again! What if you could just be you and find love there? There is hope…

Let me tell you something very personal. 10 years ago I went to my teacher for a reading. “Why can’t I get a relationship to work?” I asked.

He laughed at me and said, “You’re asking the wrong questions. You’re asking what’s wrong with you, and what you don’t see is that you have a PhD and you’re trying to get a job washing dishes. No one will hire you because they won’t believe you’ll stay.”

I went home that night and had pizza and beer and went numb. Oh, and I was 20 minutes late for the reading! Here I was going to see the person that I (at the time) most respected in the world, but there was so much energy around my receiving that information that I couldn’t seem to get there! Then, I kept trying to “wash dishes” for years until I really got it! Now, I am laughing at myself.

For years I put up walls to love, even to fully showing up in my life, not because I was insensitive, incapable, or inadequate. It was the opposite.

I felt so fully and had so much energy that I was afraid no one would be able to match me. I was afraid to open to energy that didn’t support me, but if I believed no one could match me that was all I got– people who didn’t. And so it wasn’t safe to open. Genuinely.

The most powerful lesson I learned in Aikido is that receiving is a choice. It is not something that just “happens” to us. And the more we learn to ground and center our energy, the more we can open and the more bliss we can feel.

If you’d like to learn how, I can show you. If you are ready to stop asking “What’s wrong with me?”, ready to stop blaming others, ready to call your power back so you can open and feel and live fully, join us Monday for our free call, “Discover and Release Your Hidden Blocks to Love.”

I invite you to say YES now while the energy is flowing and fresh. Sign up now and your transformation begins!

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IS A GOOD MAN HARD TO FIND?

admin — Tue, 02 Aug 2011 22:26:38 +0000

Every time I turn around it seems like women are leaving men. I can count 4 clients and close friends in the last few months alone– all of whom spent months or years convincing themselves they were happy and then suddenly couldn’t take it.

On a similar note, I couldn’t even begin to count how many female clients come to me complaining about men. They haven’t left (physically anyway), but feel resigned to a situation that displeases them.

I remember asking one woman I met who had been with her husband for decades, “What’s the secret?”

She said, “Low expectations.” I nodded and thought, I’m going to ask someone else.

I grew up listening to my mother complain about my father. I knew in my heart and soul but in my mind, it took me awhile to realize he was a good man.

Now I’m absolutely in favor of feeling and expressing our feelings– I do it plenty myself! But that’s different than complaining as a matter of habit, staying in a rut and assuming “this is as good as it gets.”

I also understand how much the feminine has been abused and dismissed on a planetary level, and how this has affected us all personally to some degree. But if we want to live amidst men, if we want to be inspired by men, and even to access our inner masculine, let’s stop complaining and support men!

No, this does not mean stay in an abusive relationship for those that are in them. No, this does not mean make ourselves smaller to accommodate men who don’t own their power.

It means loving ourselves and being strong and peaceful inside enough to also see beyond ourselves and into the heart of another. And as we are true to ourselves, others either step up or leave if they are unwilling or unable. Better that than complaining or grinning and bearing it for years!

Our thoughts and feelings all affect one another, and in a female-male partnership, the woman’s energy affects the man powerfully. Powerfully.

This is one plight of the feminine, that her gifts have been largely invisible, but it’s also one of our secrets. So ladies, if you hold in your heart and mind the possibility of fulfillment, only then do you have a chance of getting it.

Imagine the collective imprint on men of all the complaining– of the mass belief that men are jerks. What if we could see the truth, own our feelings when someone acts like a jerk, and at the same time hold a commitment to love?

Seeing one another is a HUGE first step, so obvious and yet so neglected. This is one of the most powerful benefits of an intuitive reading– a spiritual “hello”:

No, you are not crazy. Yes, you are powerful beyond measure. Yes, I see what you are feeling and it’s valid. And here’s a neutral perspective on how you can heal it.

I have been really enjoying working with more men lately as well as women and couples. I love assisting in harmonizing the masculine and feminine and I feel so honored to connect with people in a true, deep way.

We are all doing our best and we can all use support from time to time. I am seeing so many good men out there that are just lost, unseen or lonely.

I am also inspired by the wave of conscious men that are waking up and being lights in the world. Let’s stop leaking our energy into complaining and re-route it into love, consciousness and creative resolution!

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Want to use this article in your E-Zine or Web Site? You can, as long as you use this complete tag with it: Intuitive Healer Ann O’Brien publishes the “Flowering Sol” email newsletter to help you blossom into your light. If you’re ready to open up your intuition and creative power to fulfill your dream life, get your free gifts at www.FloweringSol.com.

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copyright 2011 Ann O’Brien- All Rights Reserved.

10 SECRETS TO HEALTHY RECEIVING

admin — Sun, 10 Jul 2011 20:41:25 +0000

Growing up naturally intuitive and sensitive, I was very unaware of how much I received, and it got me in trouble! Besides, I got the programming that being feminine meant receiving whatever came my way, and stuffing my feelings if it didn’t feel good.

So receiving did not feel safe, and then I spent years guarded and missing out on so much– love, money, friendships, and the opportunity to share my gifts– all because I didn’t know how to do things differently.

Can you relate? One of the questions I hear most is “How can I be receptive/ feminine/ intuitive in a healthy way? So here are some tips:

1). Make a list of things you love, and things you hate. I know, hating may not seem polite or spiritual and that’s exactly the point. By simply allowing yourself to acknowledge what you don’t want, you’ll have the discernment and trust in yourself that allows you to OPEN to what you do want. You won’t be so afraid once you do this exercise. Trust me. It’s powerful.

2). Ground yourself. If you don’t know how, listen here to a 4-minute free sample grounding meditation.

3).If you’re stuck trying to solve a problem or process an emotion and it’s not resolving, know this: It’s NOT yours. Our own problems feel like creative challenges, not hopeless mazes. Our own emotions release after a good cry or laugh or scream. So if that’s not happening, let them go. Imagine a magic soap bubble out in front of you with a magnet in it, and imagine the emotions or problem get pulled out of you into the bubble. Then see it float off as far as you can imagine and poof! Explode it. Those people will get their emotions or problems back and they’ll get the gift of finally being able to resolve them!

4). Look at your programming and role models around receiving. Did you learn to block and shield, or to take on other’s burdens, or that being open all the time was more feminine or spiritual? Once we can see our patterns, we are most of the way there to releasing them! This is why intuitive readings can help as well, since someone outside our world can often see it more clearly than we can.

5). Once you see your patterns, act them out. I mean it. Get silly! You can grab a friend for this one, exaggerate your “issues” with your partner, or do it by yourself in the mirror until you laugh. Then see if you that pattern has any hold on you again!

6). If there is something you want to know and you find yourself obsessing and wishing you had a crystal ball… stop, sit down and ground. Then close your eyes and imagine a movie screen a few feet out in front of you. See it blank, then ask your question in your mind and imagine that you “see” the answer on the screen. Be open to symbols, colors, or vague information as well as full-on movies. Trust you will be shown what will most benefit you today. When you’ve had enough, turn it off, open your eyes and enjoy being consciously receptive!

7). Ask yourself, “Where am I right now?” Of course, you know where your body is but where are YOU? Where is your attention? Simply by noticing when you are not “home,” you have the opportunity to come back to your body. When you’re present, you’re much less likely to absorb things that don’t feel good.

8). Feel your own feelings. Often when we are habitually “not home”, we are trying to escape pain. If you have physical pain, if you don’t see a spark of light in your own eyes, or if you feel numb– these are signs that you’re not feeling fully. Yes, it’s uncomfortable to feel but the only way out is through! Once we breathe into the edge of our discomfort, it begins to dissolve. Breathe and feel!

9). Fill yourself up by enjoying your life– no waiting. It may sound paradoxical to fill yourself up when you want to receive– but when you are living a full life and radiating creativity, joy and bliss– you are a magnet for more of the same. Like attracts like.

10). Know this secret. Receiving is a CHOICE. Receiving does not just happen to you, and you can choose how to receive. I learned this in the martial art of Aikido. I could take being thrown hard, because I knew how to use the energy to twirl into a somersault and come up standing. It was exhilarating. You may not be doing martial arts, but make it a game… Decide that every judgment thrown your way turns into a hundred dollar bill. Decide that every lustful stare makes you more attractive and beckons your soulmate. Choose your version and have fun!

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HOW I HEALED MY DAD

admin — Sun, 10 Jul 2011 20:35:27 +0000

Recently, I wrote an article titled “Do You Heal Men?” and got a lot of response. Apparently, this is a common issue for lots of women!

Often, I hear women complaining that male energy feels so “heavy” to them that they want to get away from men. Or, women ask me to heal their partners, and I keep bringing the reading back to them.

As much as we know we cannot change anyone but ourselves, we women have an innate perfectionism that ties in to our biological baby-making mechanism. When we make a baby, we must put the eyeball in the eye socket and not in the kneecap– or we have a big problem. We don’t need to make everything else in our world perfect, but it’s natural for us to try.

I also think that on a collective level, the feminine energy has in general not felt seen, honored or met by the masculine. Out of hunger for love the feminine has tried desperately to fix the masculine, often to the point of assuming responsibility for what’s not ours.

So about me and my Dad…

I have always had a soul connection with my Dad, but it was rough for many years. A sensitive soul and creative thinker, he also had a drinking problem and for lots of my childhood and early adulthood was spiritually “checked out”.

I was so attuned to his energy, and so wanted his love and my family’s peace, that I unconsciously absorbed both his pain and his dreams. I lived them as if they were my own.

Did this help my Dad? No. In retrospect, looking through a psychic lens, it only seemed to make things worse because I was reflecting to him parts of himself he’d denied.

So he got mad at me. And then I was not only not helping him, I was getting the opposite of what I’d wanted!

Once I started on my path of personal growth, I learned to meditate and clear energy, and I realized how much of his energy I was holding in my body. So I diligently cleared it, day after day for years. I stopped taking responsibility and I gave him his energy back.

When I began this, I did it to help myself. Not only was I clearing energy, but I also stood up to him verbally if he was drunk and obnoxious. In retrospect I was sometimes reactionary, but my intention was to care for myself.

I remember one particular day, about 10 years ago, when I picked up the phone and he was obviously drunk. I told him it was unacceptable for me to talk with him when he was like that, and I hung up.

Not long after that, he stopped drinking completely cold turkey and he has been a new man ever since. Now, we have great conversations and he is a lot of fun to be with.

Did I “heal” him? We may never know, and he says he doesn’t know why he stopped drinking. But what I do know is that during the years I absorbed his energy and put up with him, things never improved. So in a sense, perhaps I healed him by not healing him anymore!!

We can never solve problems or process issues that aren’t ours. At the same time, the people they belong to can’t process them either when we do this. It’s a lose-lose.

While letting go of responsibility for others may feel scary, like we’ll lose them or lose control… and while it may be hard initially, it can be a big win for everyone in the end. At least, it’s a win for ourselves, and that’s all we can control anyway.

Yes, male energy is heavier than female energy. But that’s not “bad.” A rock is heavier than a feather. Is a rock “bad”? Does it burden the feather? Not if the feather is in it’s natural place in the air.

Ladies, if you want something to be responsible for, try being responsible for radiating your own light. For honoring your feminine creative energy and for allowing your own happiness, even bliss– no matter how anyone else is feeling.

Here’s a secret.. actually two: 1). That’s what men want anyway. It inspires them, and when they feel it they will change without us asking them to. And isn’t our own happiness what we want anyway? Win-win!

2). That’s what will make male energy in all it’s heaviness feel “good” and not a burden. When we women fill ourselves up with our own love, male energy will feel solid as a rock and not like the weight of the world.

TRY THIS:

Sit with your eyes closed, spine erect and feet flat on the ground.

Breathe in and imagine breathing love all the way down the front of your body, to your tailbone. Breathe out and imagine the love streaming up your spine and out your head, like a shower of love-light that radiates from you.

Next, imagine a rose in front of you, like a beautiful fluffy and clear rose in full bloom. See it about 3 feet out in front of you, and imagine it vacuuming out of you anyone else’s emotions, thoughts, programs, or desires that you’ve been holding.

Keep your breath flowing and just watch as the energy leaves you and goes into the rose. When you’re ready, see the rose in your mind’s eye floating off to the edge of the horizon and see it dissolve in a puff of light. Know that all those people are getting their energy back.

Take a moment again to breathe into your own body and fill yourself with light!

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